Thursday, July 24, 2008
2. Peacekeeping Doesn’t Pay – “Anything you say dear” gives you peace in the short term but only prevents you from expressing your feelings and leads to a blow up in the long term.
3.Get Rid of Distractions – Refusing to focus on issues or important conversations simply leads to lack of intimacy and more fights down the road.
4. Quit Nagging – It gives you gains in the moment but a ultimately a long term build up of frustration.
5. No Blaming, Criticizing & Name Calling – Marital distress is a shared burden and name calling or blaming simply shifts that blame and creates more resentment.
6. Stop Bullying, Rudeness & Selfishness – These are power plays and ultimately send the message that your partner doesn’t count in your eyes.
7. Stop Stonewalling – Until you decide to deal with your issues they won’t go away.
8. Ditch Unilateral Decision Making – You’re a team, handle your issues in the same manner.
Adapted from Rita DeMaria’s book “The Seven Stages of Marriage”